Friday, May 26, 2006

Taurus the Bull

"Well, I got a Dodge Neon and a Ford Taurus."

So ended my rental-car fantasy. I chose the Taurus, if only because I have something personal against the Dodge Neon. I don't know why or for what, but man do I hate that car. The Taurus is blue - old man blue - and is built about as sturdy as this wet Kleenex that's hanging out of my nostril. It's chincy, cheap, and it makes the most annoying sounds you've ever heard.

No joke. Parking brake on? WAAAHWAAAHHHAHAHHWHAHA. Seat belt not on w/in 2 minutes? SCRREEEAM. You just want to hit it like an overbearing stepmother. I found myself talking to it as I was driving - "My your air conditioning is cold. Just feel the tips of my fingers" - I guess so far so good. The bad news is that the Honda needs some work - $500 worth of work - and seeing as I don't have $500 just lying around, I've been formulating a new plan. If I sold the Honda (and the T-Bird... almost.... there...), I could pay off my credit cards. Totally. Completely. Debt free, credit card wise.

Now here's the crazy part: With no monthly payment to make on my credit cards, I could afford new car payments.

I know what you're thinking. "But Martin," you'll say, "why would you replace your $5,000 debt with a $25,000 debt? Isn't that just multiplying the amount of money you'd owe to a creditor by five times?" To you I say, well, yes. I hadn't thought of it like that. Thank you very much for crushing my car-buying fantasy. Do you work at Enterprise Rent-A-Car? Enterprise Take-Your-Money-and-Give-You-a-Fucking-Taurus? You should apply. They think like you.

[dreamstealers]

I've been on edge this week. Snippy. Snarky. I felt so good this past weekend, so in-motion, so in-gear. Music always did give me a sense of direction. Playing a piece on the piano is like unwrapping a gift to yourself, your fingers with each stroke of the keys drawing the colorful veil back farther and farther back until you can see the corner, and you spend a few moments trying to guess where it's going, what's on the other side. With music you always know where you're headed. It's like a movie: At some point, this movie is going to end. Inevitability. Sweet inevitability. Beginnings and ends, and you standing above it all, making it all happen, the frithwebbe, the peaceweaver, weaving the songs together. Your hands take you there, keep you there, and you have to trust them to bring you back. At some point all the paper is gone, the bow stuck to your forehead, and all you have left is the gift you made for yourself.

Be joyful. Play for yourself, but be selfless with your music.

Martin

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Enterprise

I get to rent a car today!

The Honda has gone from making a low whimper to a constant, shrill scream, and like a baby at a fancy restaurant I just can't take it anywhere. The right-front brake sounds like hot metal-on-metal action, and so I'm taking it in tomorrow morning at 9 AM (jesus nine in the morning fucking hell) and then Enterprise is coming over to pick me up and take me to my temporary new car.

I've never rented a car before. My little rental-car fantasy is that they'd have all the regular cars out front but then, upon seeing me, they'd give me the special handshake and guide me down past all the regular people who drive Chevy Aveos and Pontiac G6s and we'd take an elevator down to the "basement" where they keep the Maseratis and the Ferraris. I pick a red one, drive out from behind a bush, and I'm on my way...

We'll see how it pans out. I've got a busy couple of days coming up. Fortunately I have some paying work, which will feed me until I can find some more paying work. In the meantime, I'm about to start working on the manuscript for my newest piece, "Ride the Wind," this awesome new rag that I wrote. I hope it makes a splash at Sedalia!

You know you want to,
Martin

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Ride the Wind

So, it's been awhile.

It felt good to come home today. There were a few freshly-laundered shirts on the bed, candles burning in the dining room, the smell of toasted bread and chicken heating in the oven. Sinatra cooing softly over the XM-radio, all the lights on the first floor burning bright. The house is so clean when I'm not in it - I'm like the Green Man only instead of flowers dirty clothes spring up at my feet. Mum indicated that dirty clothes in bags begin to literally decompose - news to me - so I'm trekking to the laundromat tomorrow night for my first adventure there after 11 PM. Spoiled doesn't quite communicate it. I lived next to a washer and dryer, literally right next to them, and still couldn't bring myself to make the trip from the bedroom 10 feet out and to the left. I used one bottle of fabric softener in a year. My water bill was $17.49 a month, which boiled three boxes of spaghetti and washed me off twice a week. Delicious.

Back at the homestead until August 1st, living with Mom, the whole bit. It's been refreshing in a way I didn't expect. I know who to be here. No real questions. The best part has been the silky black piano that I can play whenever I want. I missed so much the ability to create sound, real sound, loud music that shook the floorboards with my stomping foot.

Had a great trip to Rochester. Left early Friday morning, arrived Friday afternoon. We had our first lesson from 4-7. Tony was really pleased to see me I think, as I was him - and man did we have fun at the piano. I played through all 12 pieces I had prepared, making notes of each of his comments afterwards. He told me later in the trip that the key to effective teaching could be summed up in three words: What, How, and Why. It's all in the questions - first you find out what the composer is doing, what the music is telling you. Then, the mechanics, the structure. How is it being communicated. Lastly, why? Why do it that way?

I took he and his wife to dinner at P.F. Chang's, which is what happens to Chinese food when you let a Californian cook it. Dark cherry walls, dim, domed lights, resin-cast statuary at the front door, five-dollar bowls of soup. We had three waiters, and each seemed to move faster than the other. We were bodies in the river eating up a booth, but the wontons were the best I've ever had, and don't ever let anyone tell you that a fried banana sounds unappetizing.

Every time I'm with the Caramia's I find something new, a few hours every two years like a lifetime of lessons. Exponential improvement. He was pleased, even helped me finish my new rag! He called it "one of the best contemporary rags... there's nothing else like it." He even gave it a name: "Ride the Wind," and when I played it for Mum tonight, she said it sounded like a "western rag... You hop in the saddle and ride off into the sky." Sweet. I'm still nervous for Sedalia, but it will be a blast. Mr. C told me not just to have fun, but to LOOK like I was having fun.

In other words, fly casual.

1200 miles later and the Honda needs new brakes. 1200=$120 in gas. I'm a fan of Peanut M&M's. I got a sour one and almost drove off the road trying to spit it up.

I know, I know. I missed you too.

Martin